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Chief Mourner?
From Chief Guest, Main Celebrant through many others …… to now I hear “Chief Mourner”? - Any worse title than this?
What is really the meaning of this "Chief mourner" title?
Are funerals turning out to be showbiz joints for politicians and other socialites? - Really creepy.
If I say it’s rude (which is an understatement) to show up to funerals just for showbiz, I mean there’s need for respect for the dead. It’s looking more like funerals are becoming a show ground for politicians and celebrities around town. I mean half of the time you are crying, they are busy reading out Who contributed this and that, who did or didn’t do this, how much who gave or didn’t give what – no space to mourn and burry your loved ones any more. It makes me think that when you’re not family or friend and you want to be recognized by the family, sometimes all you need to do is send words of sympathy and or condolence and it’s all good.
I heard this announcement over a local radio station and I thought I could attend the burial of one of my all-time greatest friends’ grandpa. Apparently we had been friends for years and I needed to be there for her (That’s a normal procedure if you are human). It was 12 o’clock and the burial that was supposed to start at 10am was not even close to start (still a normal procedure if you come from this country). The MC – announced the apology for the delay in the start citing delay in the arrival of a certain “Chief mourner”- some title I wasn’t hearing for the first time in just a few months. I wondered if it was the wife of the deceased they were waiting for, because if that term “chief mourner” ever existed, then I guess in this case, the wife or very close relative(s) to the deceased would be referred to as such - but she (wife) was around – no need waiting. It forced me to ask the immediate person besides me if the deceased had more than one wife and I got the answer to my question that the deceased had just one wife – the one I was shown and she was onsite. 1:30pm and the one they refer to as “chief mourner” arrived. Shocked I was! A local politician (Okay, I’m sorry!); A national figure, a member of parliament and a state minister in the current government. – Now I know why the word “Chief” was used. But “Mourner”? – Still not sure if he was.
The funeral service that had a few (decent or not – none of my business after all) politicians started at 2 O’clock. A few words here and there from the religious leader and the floor was given to (I will not miss using this term) “Chief mourner”. An apology for arriving late was all how he started- (That was a predictable start). Then again, how busy he is, how he travels from one place to another, how he had to attend another funeral before coming for that (typical political speech) – then, how the “NRM and the Museveni government” (of course not Uganda’s Government) had done a lot for the people of that area and what he and the NRM government plan to do in the area in the near future. How the NRM managed to fight down LRA and so many other “supposed achievements”. “NRM Government” – who cares if Uganda has a government or not, it’s NRM Government now. – I wonder how it would sound if Besigye and or any other were in the government (FDC Government? DP, UPC, JEEMA government?) What if Inter Party Coalition won the election? IPC Government? - Still funny. Then the other politicians were given time to talk and all started pointed fingers at each other. NRM did this, that’s why this is this and stuffs (full blown negative energies) and that was just before I realized it was more of a political rally or should I say a political debate? Other than a funeral that it was.
Then each starting pulling envelopes and announcing large figures in them – ranging from 100K to 500K and the chief mourner pulled out a white envelope and announced there was Ush. 1,000,000/= in it claiming that’s to help the deceased family (I thought all the others were for the same reason). Now one politician had to stand up and said that 1million was a “stolen government money” (how did it concern him?). Let me not go deep in that heated argument. (My intention is to find out what this title “Chief mourner” means).
For heaven’s sake, the dead is body is still even not buried yet and all you are making are political speeches and arguments? isn't there anything better and more important to discuss or talk about at funeral than just some sucking political..........(whatever)? Are funerals becoming showbiz sites now? When we were little, if somebody dies in a home, the whole home and entire village goes quiet for almost a week. The only sound heard was when people were crying with grief or mourning songs (mostly in Christian homes). Nothing like I’m the mayor or whatever – didn’t hear about chief mourners and stuffs. Lately, things have turned out the other way. Funerals have become a ridiculous opportunity for showbiz and wannabes and I think it’s getting way lot disrespectful to the dead and for those who’re truly mourning. – It’s kinda creepy. People nowadays do not give a damn what funerals mean anymore – not even giving you some space to bury your loved ones. They all want to look around and see who’s next to them; they want to be the first in every line; near the gravesite & the food stand. It is getting too sad & chaotic. I don’t know about a lot of people but IMO, Funerals are a farewell to our befallen loved ones and should be done in a simple but respectful, dignified and spiritual way. I am greatly saddened by the new trend.
Now can somebody tell me when and how this title “Chief mourner” came about? And what are the holders’ dos and don’ts (I may call them duties and responsibilities in this case – if it’s a job)? - They (Chief mourners) are really very annoying if you are the one who lost a family member or someone you love